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I just wanted to do a little blog to say I have been reading http://theworldaccordingtoeggface.blogspot.com/ and as of right now I am addicted to her recipes and blog. Her recipes come out delicious and perfect for those who have gone through any kind of weight loss surgery. Right now she is doing a spring giveaway which includes a lot of stuff that I would definitely need especially since my surgery is this coming Wednesday. Here is the link http://tinyurl.com/7l4rok3


In other news

MY SURGERY IS 2 DAYS AWAY!!!! YAY ME!

My Apologizes and so much to catch up on

Man I really need to get better at blogging especially since I actually like doing it. So first and foremost I want to say sorry to my followers (if I have any). OK where do I even start. Well the last post I had basically stated that I was a few pounds down, I wear and CPAP for sleep apnea and etc. Well I am proud to say that (drum roll please)

 

 

 I GOT APPROVED!!!! After a plethora of tests that I had to do they finally submitted my paperwork to my insurance company and 2 weeks later I was approved. I am so happy that this journey will actually start and its reality, its not a dream anymore. 

As far as the weight loss that I was supposed to lose by this time right now. I struggled, I struggled a lot! I gained a few, lost a few and my BIG setback was that for some reason in 2 weeks I gained 7 lbs. I say for some reason but I know, I admitted to myself that I gained those 7lbs because of what I ate. I ate something I wasn't supposed to. Not a lot of it but instead of following the no carbs eating, I failed and ate carbs. BAD ME!! I went to my appt. with my surgeon and she was kind of shocked but told me just keep on losing the weight. I need 7 more to lose before my surgery which is 10 days away. I know I can do it and I will. The biggest question that most people have ask me is am I nervous or scared. As of right now I am neither, I am more excited then anything. I know it will be a major challenge but I am ready to take it on. The only thing I am worrying about is the fact that I get majorly nauseous and vomit a lot after having anesthesia, my stomach hates it and since I am having surgery on my stomach I think the pain will be even worse. I hate that I get so sick and am hoping that they will have something to help the nausea ease during the coming out of it process. We shall see.

 Things that I am afraid of after surgery

• I'm afraid my husband won't like me as much as a smaller chick, he loves the plus size women with big boobs. I don't think I'll have much left of my boobies.
• I'm afraid that my ass will be no more, I barely have one now.
• I'm afraid my boobs will be no more, they've already gone from a DD to a C.
• I'm afraid of the loose skin hanging all over the place.
• I'm afraid I'm going to have a lollipop figure (big head small body)

 So I know I mentioned a loooong time ago that we are looking into moving and I am happy to say that 2012 we are moving. We are extremely excited about it. My husband has a hook up out there and he is currently looking into working as an RA. If we do go his job will pay for a place to live until we get settled into our own place. That would give me enough time to look for a place to work and get the kids into daycare/school. It's just time for us to do what we need to do for our family. It's going to be hard especially since we are both so close to our family but we have to do what we need to do for us. We'll be able to see our family a few times a year and we'll still have the Internet and thank God for Skype. It's going to be strange at first but I am sure we will adapt.

WORK

Work has been crazy, I'm not stressing about it though. You just have to roll with the punches, its the same o same o and I'm just so used to it that I let it roll off my back and move on.

 

OK well, I promise that I will keep updating on my procedure and life in itself, I know I've said it before but I am going to try. 

 

My procedure is on April 4, 2012 at 10:30. Here's to a new me and a new life with my family.

Progress and Check in

Just a quick little update

It's all happening so fast. So I proceed on my journey to weight loss surgery I am proud to say that i lost 13lbs. so far. Even my surgeon office was shocked that I lost that much in 2 weeks. I'm happy about that but I did realize one thing. Those 13lbs came off because I was eating what i was supposed to which is vegetables and protein. In other words no breads, cereal, rice, pastas and etc. When I started week 3 this past Monday I was like well maybe I can eat some bread, just a little. Well that was a wrong thing because the bread then turned to 2 slices to a helluva lot of other things that I won't even mention. Wrong thing to do and when I start Week 4 on Monday, I am going back to No Sugars, if its not protein and vegetables don't eat!

Sleep Apnea & The CPAP

After my sleep study, I got the results back and I was shocked to see that I actually have sleep apnea and I am not just overly exhausted. My doctors office even said that it was a severe case and that I would need to start using the CPAP machine to treat it until I lose more weight. I wasn't excited about the machine at all, but I was excited about getting more sleep and not falling asleep while on the road. I went to pick up my machine and while I was there i tried on 2 masks that look like torture. I picked one that I felt comfortable with and took it home.

1st night was awful, it was uncomfortable and I had to keep myself from having a panic attack, my ears kept popping every time I swallow, I couldn't adjust it, air kept coming out. I got so fed up, I ended up snatching it off and just sleeping without it. 2nd night was a little better, I got it to fit right, my ears still popped everytime I swallowed and I ended up snatching it off because something scared the crap outta me and I couldn't take it anymore. Night 3 was better than all of them, I put the mask on, elevated my pillows and went to sleep quite fast, my ears popped again but not as bad but I slept. I still ended up taking the mask off in the middle of the night, due to me having really really dry mouth. In the end i guess its just going to take some time to get used to it but I try to think positive, once I lose more weight I won't need a machine period.

So let's see, these past 2 weeks, I had an awesome weigh in, I went to my venous ultrasound which came out good, no blood clots or risks of blood clots in either leg. I went to my 1st support group and my bariatric nutrition class. Next up is my EKG, Gallbladder Ultrasound, Chest x-ray, Labs and I think that may be it. I'm excited and also nervous but more excited. I now see why they call WLS a learning tool to use to lose and maintain weight. Back in the days like most people I too thought that WLS was the easy way out but after all the research that I have done and the support groups I have gone too, I now see that its not the easy way out, its a life change that you have to stick to because if you don't you can still gain all the weight back.

Honesty

MY WEIGHT

I have been very self conscious and quiet about my weight ever since I realized I was overweight or obese. I realized I was overweight in 6th grade, I remember I was sitting outside with all of my friends and we were all sharing how much we weighed. I proudly told everyone that I was 114lbs. They all looked at me and said that's a lot. I was so embarrassed and at that point I just knew I would never ever tell anyone how much I weigh. They can just use their own judgement.

It wasn't until I started doing Vlogs on YouTube that I figured who cares, its a weight loss journey vlog and only people who are in the same boat as me are going to watch it so why not. I think I am up to that point right now where I know I need to lose weight and now is the time to just be comfortable sharing how much I weigh and how much I am looking to lose and etc.

The next Blog will be my weight with all the goal dates that I will try and stick to. Doc said I need to lose 30 pounds before my gastric and I will and I will check in and log it for the ones who follow my journey and for those who just care to see how I'm doing.

It Starts

WARNING THIS BLOG MAY SOUND A BIT RAMBLY!!!!

(in other words I may go on and on at random)

After much anticipation, I finally got my appointment with my surgeon to talk about my procedure. Before that me and my husband went to an orientation session that talked about each one of the procedures (Lap-Band, Gastric Sleeve and Gastric Bypass). I pretty much knew which one I was going to get but it was good to hear the risks, the side effects and the percentage of weight loss.

Next came my sleep study. Wow! the sleep study was so scary and uncomfortable. For one thing I had to go alone and it was at night when the offices in that building are closed. I walked in and there was a tall man who may have been Russian he had a strong accent but I don't know. He led me in the office and I was so glad to see that there were other people there so I wasn't going into a torture chamber. I walked into what would be my room and it looked like a hotel room it had a nice bed and fluffy pillows, he proceeded by putting about 8-10 sensors all over the face, neck, head and nose. He told me to lay down, also instructed me to try and stay on my back (which really sucks because I'm a side back sleeper) and put a sensor in my nose that measured the way I breath and said if I have trouble or stop breathing then he will have to hook me up with the CPAP which is a device that controls sleep apnea. He said goodnight and closed the door. At first I couldn't sleep at all and was just staring at the dark, I was so used to being in bed with my husband with the TV on or even hearing my one year old babbling in the background. Once I got used to that I fell asleep. My dreams were so odd that night, I can't even explain what happened but they were interrupted by him coming in and telling me that I would need the mask to help me sleep better.

 Holy crap is that mask uncomfortable! I thought I was going to have a freaking panic attack! He put it on me and made it tight, said goodnight again and left. Omg I thought I was going to freak out, I have this crap that has air coming through that I am breathing in, I started to think, am I actually in a torture chamber? After I took a deep breath I calmed down and went to sleep, the weird dreams started again and were again interrupted by someone from somewhere telling me to lay back on my back because I was making the CPAP do weird things. So I rolled back over to my back and fell back asleep. Next thing you know the CPAP shuts off and it feels like my air was half taken away and again I almost panicked, I needed someone to come right away to take this device off of me. Needless to say and to make a long story short,  besides the major back pain that i had because I slept uncomfortable and on my back all night, I had the best sleep ever with that machine.

Diagnosis: The tech said I would need to use the machine until I lost more weight.

I am not looking forward to it but I am looking forward to feeling refreshed when I wake up and not falling asleep while driving.

Moving right along to my one on one. I went in to talk to my surgeon about my options and what she thought was the best for me. She actually ended up saying that she thought the Gastric Bypass (instead of the gastric sleeve) would be the best procedure for me......uh.....I'm not too sure about that. She said I have a while to thing about it which is good and that I should just keep researching and talking to anyone who has had it done.

Next up....scheduling a crap load of appointments with the coordinator. 

I won't type it all but I will post what needs to be done so you can see.

DIET!

The surgeon wants me to lose 30lbs. before the procedure. GOOD LAWD!!! I know I can do it though. I am on my way to a new life and a new me and I'm so excited.

In other news

Next year we plan on trying to get our lives settled, we are hoping and praying that everything will all fall into place. We are hoping the hubby gets a job, gets his license back, we find a Lil apartment and find a more reliable car all by February of 2012. Let the savings and frugal living begin.....AGAIN

Until next time, stay happy healthy and drama free.

Quote for today:

Our life's a stage, a comedy: either learn to play and take it lightly, or bear its troubles patiently.
Palladas

My 1st Appointment was to make appointments (short and sweet)

Update regarding my appt.

My first appt at association of south bay surgeons was kind of lame. They checked my weight and took a snapshot of me like a mugshot and then I was taken to a lady who set up 2 appts. for me, one for an orientation and one for a one on one with my surgeon. I asked the lady if she knew when my insurance would tell me if its approved and she said if I got this far I will probably be approved. So I'm keeping my fingers crossed that I'm not going through all of this for nothing. Wish me luck!

Work life

So I finally figured out why I get so stressed out at work, its not what I do for the Corp. office and its not what I do for my crazy manager. It's what I do to help people out and when something happens frustration happens, upset happens and I feel like its taken out on me. I swear if you don't think I'm capable of doing something then just take me away and let me just focus on something else. I know I am a good worker and I know I do my job well. I may have stuff to work on as an assistant manager but I know that what I do should be appreciated, I get that appreciation from some but never from the cause of my stress. Oh well its cool.....I'm done venting now, tomorrow is another day.

What do they think?



Change is going to come and what do my family and friends think about it?

My Husband

When I told my husband about it, he wasn’t against it but he wanted to go with me to ALL appts. And here what is exactly going to be going on. After that he’ll make the decision if he’s ok with it too. His point is that he doesn’t want anything bad to happen; he doesn’t want to lose his wife and etc. I totally understand what he is feeling.

My Mom & Dad

I told Mom about what my decision was and surprisingly she wasn’t against it. She told me to pray about it and whatever I decided she would be there for me. At first I didn’t even want to tell her at all but this time I told her about my research that I’ve been doing for it and why I made the decision and she was so positive. We both would practically die if we lost each other. My Well I haven’t had the chance to talk to him about it……well…I actually don’t know if I want to tell him about it at all. I’m kind of scared of his response. I shouldn’t be because my Dad loves me and is always there for me through whatever I go through but I’m kind of just not telling him until I find out details for sure and if I am even approved. So Dad will have to wait.

My co-workers

I’ve been telling some people at work about it, only the people that are close to me because I don’t think its anybody else’s business. My close co-workers are very supportive and if I get it done they are going to be my support too. At work we tend to snack, snack, snack and snack, so with support from them too I know I’ll be strong.

My friends

I’ve only told a few friends, I don’t have many friends so I guess I should say that I’ve told 2 friends. My 2 friends asked a lot of questions basically the usual what is it, why do you want it, do you feel you need it and what are the common side effects. Since I’ve been researching for so long I had the answer to EVERY question. I was fully prepared for their negativity and their thoughts of being against it but surprisingly they both had my back and said if I needed anything during the process just let them know.

Dr. Takahashi

My 1st doctor’s appt. is tomorrow. I’m anxious and excited at the same time. The last couple of weeks my weight has been like a Yo Yo, up 3lbs. down 2 lbs. up 1 lb. down 3 lbs. It’s so annoying!

I appreciate all the thoughts, support of prayers from my family and friends and we’ll see what the doc says tomorrow.

Until next time, have a great week!